SOMETIMES I WRITE...

Poems by Robyn Lianne

Awake in November

Waking up with you hiding in the covers and I miss it already
Snuggled into the crease of your armpit, my head upon your chest
Listening to the heart that pounds into my eardrum
Your fingertips tickle my skin and I never want you to stop
Stay here, don't leave, don't ever leave
Safe from this cold beautiful world I fear everything
Because when you're afraid, there's something left to lose

Sometimes I fall, sometimes I'm at fault
Sometimes we crash, but we never burn
I'd do anything for you
Anything you'd want me to do, for you
November isn't sweet at all when I'm alone
But our distance reminds me of how much I love you
5 days, 9 hours and always counting minutes
I can't sleep


Frozen To His Words

I had admired his persona for he had told me lies
As he disguises himself to be oh so genuinely kind
His words became his weapon, as I was left unarmed
Lying without consequence, presuming he was charmed

Though I found it hard to fathom
That he would treat me in such a way
In his arrogance my body was numb
And my love for him withered away

Indubitable secrets were meant to be realized
His endearing imperfections I began to despise
He walked around in shadows, scented of distaste
An unaccepted appology hidden in his handsome face

I have become entirely frozen
To the language he dares to speak
His worthlessness left me broken
And all alone on a one way street


Broken

You were supposed to help me with the puzzle of you and I
Putting us back together the way you said we belonged
Instead you chose to hurt me with the one person I could never forgive you for

Maybe she is the trophy to stand on your bookshelf
As the chapter of you and I closes in the distant thought of us
For many nights I shall lie awake in my lonesomeness
Because of what you have done to me

How could you do this to me? How could I let this happen?
The itching desire to be vengeful causes nothing but pain
You always took my love for granted
But she made you breakfast as you lied in her bed thinking about me
The mistake of wanting to move on that costs nothing but heartache for yourself

I hope she is thinking about me and the way you needed me
I hope she is crying the way you made me cry over her
I hope that she knows she will love you more than you could ever love her back
And maybe in her sadness she will be reminded of the pain I am feeling right now

I know now that I am the reason I am hurting
I gave into you just to get cut down once more
I actually trusted you when you said that you loved me
You said you never meant to hurt me but you didn’t mean it
You slept with her in spite of me and you were aching for me to find out

Now as I say goodbye I know that I truly mean it this time
Insecurities you have left me with forever
You lie in shame as you remember that you threw it all away
For some nobody nothing of a girl you thought you once loved years ago

My sleepless nights are over as the light shines through the frosted window
On a cold winter morning the month after December
I toss this past year into the back of my thoughts
Out of sight, out of mind, where you belong

I have chosen to find my strength
I will forever more stand tall and proud of who I am
I won’t let anyone break me the way you broke me
Are you broken now?

And as I stand on the outside of us knowing that you never wanted a life with her
I wonder and I ask myself: “Does he regret it now?"


I'm not at all a poet, but sometimes when I'm down and out the words flow through me and this is my way of releasing my emotions and turning what disappoints/upsets me into something I can be proud of. It's part of who I am. Hope you like my 'poetry'. (;

xo